Diaz and Smith in a bar. Photo from: aceshowbiz.com
I rarely think a movie needs a sequel, but Bad Teacher is on that short list. The movie, starring Cameron Diaz, tells the story of a lazy, irresponsible teacher who is beyond materialistic and selfish. I’ve seen this movie dozens of times on TV, but recently I watched the unrated extended version. After that, I knew why it needs a sequel – in a good way of course.
It’s a good comedy. There have been some pretty good ones over the last few years, but most modern comedies try to shock the audience or gross them out (eg. excessive vomiting). However, Bad Teacher is funny because of the dialogue. Sure, there is one bathroom scene and it can be a little immature, but the dialogue and conflicts are well written. It is pretty adult but not over the top or trying to disgust you.
Fun, distinct characters. The people make or break it. The story can be solid, but if the characters suck, the movie will. Bad Teacher has a great cast who feed off each other, and in many cases, opposites attract. I’d love to see these characters together again. Aside from Diaz, the movie stars:
Lucy Punch (crazy but good teacher who cares about the kids), Jason Segel (cool gym teacher who likes to smoke weed), Justin Timberlake (preppy, geeky substitute teacher), Phyllis Smith (teacher and the best best friend ever), and John Michael Higgins (dolphin-loving principal).
Diaz is terrible, but you can’t help but like her. She’s selfish, manipulative, mean, and horrible with kids. And it’s so funny. Smith is a great asset to the movie because she seems like the average teacher, but she’s fun and the most supportive person ever. People need to be that kind of best friend. Punch plays a great teacher – the kind who freak us out a little with their enthusiasm for learning – and I could so see Segel as a gym teacher in another life.
School environment. I really like movies that take place in schools, especially when they’re not dramas. Bad Teacher portrays the school life well. For example, Diaz receives a $37 gift card from the staff as a going-away engagement present. I was surprised by how well the actors play teachers, and I know a lot of teachers. The kids are great too. Noah Munck (Gibby from iCarly) and Kathryn Newton (teen girl in Paranormal Activity 4) are two students you may know.
The end. SPOILER alert! At the end of the movie, Diaz starts a new school year as a guidance counselor, doesn’t get the boob job, and is dating Segel, which is a cute match. It’s a very good ending because she is much better at counseling, but I want to see her in that role. Diaz as a guidance counselor would be awesome. Her advice is real. The kind of advice that’s sometimes hard to give and take (I give a lot of this kind of advice, so I can relate and appreciate it).
The sequel factor. The movie isn’t highly rated, so a sequel will probably never happen. However the end wraps everything up so well, if you enjoy the movie, you want more. That’s a good sign of a good movie. You watch it, enjoy it, and think I could rewatch that or I wish there was more. Good films make the audience want more.
If you like comedies or want to chill to a movie, check it out. It’s good fun.
With a new year and the hope of my own creative wellspring finally pouring forth I thought I’d take the time to examine some of the sources for my creative inspiration. This week I’m starting with a humbling catalogue of the Grim Dark (and world of fantasy) that is the Black Library.
Named after a library of esoteric and powerful knowledge, Games Workshop’s publishing wing is a remarkably diverse and impressive publishing enterprise. From gothic sci fi, to rousing action, and from grim brutality, to raucous humor, the Black Library offers something for everyone, and indeed I was a fan of the stories prior to partaking in the table top game that spawned them, my first novel being the Assault on Black Reach which I purchased shortly after buying the starter set of the same name.
I find the worlds depicted by the Black Library authors to be deep and complete. Everything has layers upon layers and builds atop decades of history already put into the stories and characters within.
Some of the authors are terrific, some are quite good and the same can be said for the quality of the stories they tell, but I can honestly say I’ve never read a bad one. Merely some less impressive than others. I thought I’d give a breakdown of some of my favorites, broken down by broad type and in no particular order of superlative.
Favorite Series
Horus Heresy by Various: Simply some of the best science fiction you’ll read anywhere. The series is vast and deep, providing a prequel view of some of the famed characters you may do battle with on the tabletop. The first four novels are sequential and could have been printed on pure gold leaf they are so ostentatiously brilliant. Want to know how the whole thing started? Here’s how. And if you don’t feel a pang of tragedy at Isstvan something is broken in your soul…
Caiphas Cain by Sandy Mitchell: Can the grim dark future be wry and funny? With a rakish and self-serving (at least according to him) hero like Commissar Cain you beter believe they can be. Sandy Mitchell (aka Alex Stewart) created a hero both likable and slightly devious. He’s altruistic and at the same time totally self-obsessed, told in the first person (with commentary footnotes from another reader, Inquisitor Amberley Vail) it’s marvelous at giving a personal obscured perspective on things. The series takes him from his humble beginnings seeking a quiet posting away from danger to all over the galaxy fighting every kind of enemy on every front. Each novel is different and each one spectacular. If you need a laugh and great adventure, pour yourself a glass of someone else’s best Amasec and open a Caiphas Cain book.
Last Chancers by Gav Thorpe: Gav Thorpe is my personal favorite Black Library author and his take on the penal conscript legion of Colonel Schaeffer one of his best works. I read the whole thing at night during a week-long trip to Chicago and loved every bit of it. The first novel is by far the best, but by the time you reach the third book’s rousing conclusion you really have a chance to look back and see how far these characters have come.
Favorite Short Stories/Novellas
Yarrick Chains of Golgotha by David Annandale: This novella/short story is simply stunning in its narrative. From the capture of the imposing Commissar Sebastian Yarrick by his arch nemesis to his exciting attempts at escape, this one has you hooked from the beginning. When you get to the end and see just HOW dangerous his infamous and nefarious captor really is to him and the Imperium it’s hard not to start the book over and read it all the way through again. I know I did. Very few books can make me say, “Ohh…whoa” out loud like this one did at its conclusion.
Survivor by Steve Parker: The tale of a young boy surviving in the ruins after an ork invasion. It’s a great story with a sharp narrative, but the reveal of the boy’s identity makes it even more powerful. A short read but one that definitely sticks with you.
Dark Vengeance by CZ Dunn: Some 40k players are all about the win. Others are all about the story. I’m in the latter category and this story is a great example of the game brought to narrative. Released to coincide with the 6th Edition starter set, Dark Vengeance tells the story of the characters and armies you get with that box. Not only that but you get a relatively realistic portrayal of how a battle between these two armies can usually play out on the table; who lives, who dies, who’s valuable and who’s just a pawn. A great place for beginners who are just getting into the game with the starter set!
Favorite One Offs/Unique
Fifteen Hours by Mitchel Scanlon: This one’s tagline got me: “Basic Training: Four Months. Planetary Transportation: Seven Weeks. Life Expectancy…Fifteen Hours.” I loved this book. Not only is it 40k World War I style, but it’s also 40k told small. Not great heroes or famous battles, just one of trillions of guardsmen and one of millions of battles. The story doesn’t revolve around our heroes and neither do the events. We merely see a vast war through their very small scope. It’s All Quiet on the Western Front with orks and lasguns and simply a terrific read.
Deff Skwadron by Gordon Rennie & Paul Jeacock : A 40k comic about ork fighter pilots. It’s as good as it sounds. Let’s face it orks are funny and brutal. Their single minded desire to fight and kill is highly entertaining and this comic captures that mood both in a great set up and magnificent orky-art. If you read no other 40k comic definitely check this one out.
Headtaker by David Guymer: It’s not ALL the grim dark! This fantasy story revolves around my favorite fantasy battles character. With all the betrayal and backstabbing you’d expect from skaven…Queek Headtaker leads his armies, fighting against his allies as much as his foes…and showing everyone who really is the most clever rat in the under empire.
Next week I’ll tackle the audio drama/audio book arm of Black Library which is definitely worth its own separate study!
Tool. What can I say? For those of you who don’t know the band, they’re a multigenre band from Los Angeles who’s been around since 1990. They are my No. 2 favorite band, behind U2.
I don’t write about music often because it’s often too close to my heart. However, if I practice what I preach in some if you want to write posts, that’s exactly what I should do – be honest and open.
Chances are if you grew up in the ’90s, you know Tool. They emerged around the same time as Nine Inch Nails, Rage Against the Machine, Nirvana, etc. You know, when music was actually good.
They’re considered metal, but I classify them as multigenre because they embrace industrial, rock, and many more.
For this reason and more, here’s why they are awesome and underrated:
Unique: Many bands try, but no one comes close to sounding like them. Maynard’s voice is one of a kind and often hypnotic. Tool is the only band I can sleep to anytime. The lyrics are deep, sometimes dark or fun, and always powerful. The bass is heavy, and the band has some of the best bass lines I’ve ever heard. Other bands try to cover Tool songs, and often fail because no one can replicate them.
They do what they want: Tool releases and album every five or so years. In fact, the last album came out in 2006, and there’s talk of a new one, but fans know until it comes out, it’s just talk. They do whatever and play whatever they want. As one of the biggest bands in the metal genre, their music is not available on iTunes. They tour occasionally, but Maynard has two other bands and his own winery, Caduceus Cellars. Musically, they don’t care if you like them or listen to what they put out, they just do it. And do it well.
The live show: I’ve been lucky enough to see them twice – Lallapalooza ’97 and in 2012 in Georgia. Two very different performances, and both were unforgettable. At both shows, the crown sang every word to every song. I haven’t experienced that at any other show; no other fans are as die-hard as Tool fans. The light shows are like what I would think an acid trip is like. The music hits hard and resonates deep in your body and soul.
Maynard James Keenan: Tool could not be Tool without the entire band, but I have incredible respect for frontman Maynard. The beautiful thing is he doesn’t act like a frontman. He doesn’t have to be in the spotlight; in fact, he avoids it. At the 2012 show, he stayed in the dark silhouetted the entire show. Some criticized him for it, but if you know him, you know he may have not felt it that night. He may also have decided to show he’s not the only member who is important. Whatever the reason, he always does what he wants. He’s not a diva about it, either.
The music: I have been a Tool fan for 20 years. I can listen to them no matter what mood I’m in. There’s so much power and emotion in the music, it can make me angry or evoke emotions I’ve suppressed. It’s not a bad thing because the music allows me to admit and confront the issue. On the other hand, sometimes it calms me in tough time. I remember playing the song Aenima on repeat after a pet’s passing. I can drown out and forget the world when listening to Tool. Not many bands can do that for a listener. It’s an experience.
So, there you have it. Feel free to share your thoughts below, and check them out if it’s your thing!
Family Feud, one of the most popular game shows of our time, has been around since 1976. I have seen the show progress throughout my life, enjoyed yelling answers at the T.V., and calling contestants idiots for not thinking of obvious answers.
Until recently, I hadn’t watched it in years, so I was a little unprepared a few weeks ago when my son and I were watching.
The question: Name something a woman puts in a male stripper’s g-string.
Ummm… what?
I didn’t freak out because he is a teenager, however I thought about all those families with small kids who may be watching. I can only imagine an 8-year-old asking, “Mom, what’s a g-string? What’s a stripper? And parents having some tough decisions to make.
Sure enough, my kid asked what a g-string was. With pink cheeks, I chose the honest answer even though I would have rather said, “a string in the shape of a G” (wink, wink). One answer was “her mouth,” which I did feel was a bit much. Isn’t this supposed to be a family-friendly show?
This is what inspired this post. Family Feud isn’t really for families. It hasn’t always been either. In fact, in the ’70s the show was slightly promiscuous with host Richard Dawson, but not because of the questions, but because he was a ladies man who loved the flirt and kiss them. Some questions provoked “adult” words, like sex, but for the most part it was nothing shocking, especially for the late ’70s and early ’80s.
As the show progressed with the times, it became more tame. Either I was conditioned to it as a kid (the last time I watched it with host Ray Combs), or I didn’t care, but nothing seemed very thought-provoking or too grown up. In the early 2000s, hosts Louie Anderson and Richard Karn brought the show into the 21st century, and I admit I only watched a few episodes, thinking it was a little boring or predictable.
Now in 2015, with host Steve Harvey, there’s definitely some spice, and most questions are way too adult for younger audiences. Recently, I’ve seen answers on the board such as “hot nurse”, “hoo hoo” (in reference to a female’s part), and heard questions like “name one thing you’d do if your husband was wearing a thong.”
I’m not opposed to the show, just opposed to it airing during early evening hours when many families are flipping channels before/after dinner. I’m a little surprised its allowed due to the content and the fact they won’t even show cartoons that are too adult before 9 p.m. It seems like bad taste, and I would hate for a small child to know too much too soon from watching a “family” game show that’s very age specific – 13 and up seems appropriate.
Overall, I enjoy the show, but I do warn those with younger kids to keep flipping channels for a few years. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below, and enjoy these clips!
I never understood that phrase until very recently. I always thought I did but in the spirit of my “let it go” 2015 mentality I thought I’d share how I came to realize what this really means. I apologize for the length of this post but most of us can relate and this is the last, final release of this whole thing!
In November 2012 I left a job with government I had been in for 9 years. It was my first full-time position and though the pay was low I often convinced myself it was worth it due to the laid back atmosphere and a lot of the personalities there. I met some of the most interesting people working there. When I first started right out of college it seemed like a great place. Chances for growth, good benefits, and caring leadership. Over the years there was a subtle, then a not-so-subtle shift. The pay stayed low and with the increase in benefits prices (benefits that started to get worse) I actually netted less in 2012 than I did in 2011. But from when I started in 2003-about 2010 it felt mostly ok. We liked to complain about processes and personalities, and we could goof off a bit (paperwad wars that lasted a few weeks) but overall it was just work that could be done then left at the office.
Sometime in 2009-2010 things really started to change. The leadership had a shakeup and new people came in. One of my friends actually became a second-in-charge, and there was talk that even I’d get to move up. I’d already gone from entry level, to mid-level, to project management and committee chair so it felt like things were proceeding ok.
My last year there all my illusions were suddenly and violently ripped apart and reality became clear. I was named “co-head” of a new department. I was kept at my previous salary despite essentially managing other employees and still chairing and budgeting for my committee. I considered it ok, it was still a move up and into better things. Then came the yearly evaluations. The other co-head and I were asked to provide these for our direct reports. I wrote honest but well-tempered evaluations, pointing out where things could be improved but always measured this by how what could be considered “defects” were often bonuses. Yes some of us took extra time to perform a task others might do in a fraction of the time, but the end result of that individual’s work was often subtly far superior due to her training, experience, and natural eye. Yes some of us might take some time to have non-sequiturs and discuss movies, video games, or kung fu for a few minutes but that kind of atmosphere is the reason we were considered to be the “best” department to be around by visitors. We were all friendly and morale was high, even when hitting roadblock after roadblock in our work.
During my evaluation (I was one of the first to be evaluated in my group) I was told I received one of the very few (I’d heard less than 5 out of 100 but that could’ve been untrue) perfect scores and was told by the big boss “we can’t do what we do here without you.” When I inquired whether I would qualify for any kind of extra compensation based on my performance I was told “you aren’t qualified.” This despite money spent in this organization on PC replacements every two years, iPads for directors, and catered food for some ivory tower departments.
When the rest of the team was evaluated I discovered that many of my comments were edited and only the negative focused on. It turned out, according to the bosses, people were wasting time (and cruelly told they wouldn’t be replaced when they left) or talking too much. Parts of what was intended was taken out of context and used against them.
I felt awful that something I said could have been used this way. That I should’ve been more careful. And that I’d been used as an unwitting spy against my colleagues. I fired off an email the following day to the staff involved and the leadership saying as much. I received a minimal response, but at least one employee did get his evaluation amended.
This is what I felt like they made me do…
It was at this point that I went from being so valuable “they couldn’t do what they do without me” to being a pariah. Simply by speaking out against what I saw was an injustice I wasn’t included in meetings. Duties shifted to the other co-head (who was far more “compliant”) and any talk of my performance (which was universally regarded as exemplary) resulting in further advancement silenced.
More importantly the management had proven themselves to be willing to do anything, sell anyone out, and use anyone in order to get the side of the story they wanted. There were people they didn’t like and they used others to hurt them.
Given that environment I started looking for a new job. A friend of a friend turned me on to a startup department in a private company. It wasn’t in my field but given the chance to move up and out I interviewed. I liked what the manager had to say about being involved from the ground up and teamwork and when I got the call I was being offered the position I took it. This surprised essentially everyone I knew as we all assumed we’d be in our familiar “ruts” forever.
I turned in my two weeks’ notice and not one person in management seemed to care. They seemed only to care if I agreed to stay in my current job at my current salary (doing supervisor work for 26k pretax yes 26k after NINE years of perfect evals and TWO promotions…). So I turned in my two weeks and got ready to leave.
Even in my last two weeks I spent full days finishing an exhibit I was working on to make sure it was done in time for a media event planned for the political boss of my organization (which entirely by consequence was held on my last day). I finished it just in time and one of my best friends managed to get food and the press there for the guests (it was for veterans of the Korean and Vietnam Wars.) I was even to say a few words to the crowd about the importance of this display.
Before I got up to talk my organization boss stood up and made some comments. One of which announced it was my last day and added, “well money talks.” After everything that had happened that comment was shocking to me. Everything I’d done, almost anonymously there, all the extra time I put in, all the hard work I’d done right up until the end was put into the light that I’d left them because I was unappreciative of them. Given the audience I ignored his jibe and stuck to my comments about how important the exhibit was (one of the veterans highlighted called it “the best day of his life”). And with that I left that place.
This is tempting…but rarely fulfilling.
The new job was strange. My new manager made it clear we all are needed to follow the same procedures and made us feel appreciated for doing good work. In my off time I built a database for fun. Word about it apparently got out and other department managers came by to see it saying “I’ve heard you did something cool.” In less than two years I was given the opportunity to move into supervisory and leadership roles twice. I wasn’t the only one. Other great performers were also given their due. And every step of the way our sacrifices and good work weren’t just appreciated but often we were given kudos publicly so others could see what the team could do and their morale increased as well. I’d never been in a place like this. It’s not perfect but a good manager goes a long way. Someone who is there to teach you, assist you, and defend you rather than steal your ideas and throw you under a fleet of buses.
So back to “the best revenge is living well.” I’ve heard that phrase my entire life but always misunderstood it. To me it meant that you can get revenge on those who have wronged you by living well and doing so to show them how well you’ve done; to really rub it in that you’ve succeeded and you no longer need their approval or assistance. How wrong-headed that kind of thinking is…by being spiteful you are validating that they still have sway over you. The best revenge is living well because once you get to the “living well” part you no longer care about the wrongs done to you. They don’t have any meaning. I have no desire to go back to my old job and rub my success in their faces (clearly as I haven’t named anyone in this narrative) it’s enough just to be satisfied.
Recently another friend left and she confirmed that all the anger and sadness she felt working there essentially evaporated upon leaving.
I’ve said it before but we all can find ourselves in poisonous and negative relationships. They might be coworkers, friends, or relationships but by getting out of them and finding your own way you can take your revenge better than any desk-flipping, profanity-laced tell-off might. Anger takes effort and energy. By moving on and living well you do them the worst damage: you forget about them. And with this post, and my realization of what “the best revenge is living well” I’m forgetting that place forever. It’s just a thing that happened now to get me here.
So here’s to living well in the new year!
Had to use this one! There’s a little of the Unforgiven in all of us…it’s just best not to unleash the Interrogator Chaplains every time.
During my recent Supernatural binge, I remembered two of my favorite characters, mother-daughter team Ellen (Samantha Ferris) and Jo (Alona Tal). I often jump around, but I stopped to watch the episodes featuring these characters, who are so well done. TV shows and movies need more women like them.
Beauty Within the Beast
Pop culture is big on women right now. We have strong female characters assuming more masculine roles, but if you think about it, few are really attractive or feminine. As much as I love Michonne from The Walking Dead or Ripley from the Alien movies, these ladies are not considered beautiful by today’s standards.
This is one reason Ellen and Jo are different. Especially for her age, Ellen is a simple but elegant woman. She will kick your a$$ in a heartbeat, though. The producers seem to have wanted her to be beautiful even though she runs a saloon. Her hair is always down, she always wears a little makeup, and has a nice figure, especially for a woman now pushing 50. Her facial expressions make her tough looking, but she still has nurturing eyes and worry lines to show the caring, softer side.
Simply put, Jo is a tiny hot blonde. When you think of petite blondes, you may think fragile and not very bright. Jo is tough and smart. Upon first meeting (Everybody Loves a Clown), Dean takes her shotgun away, and she punches him in the face. At first, he’s actually scared of her. Jo proves you can have a small, trim figure, long blonde hair and a great smile, and still beat the crap out of anyone who gets in the way.
Hard on the Outside, Soft in the Center
Sounds like a strawberry bon bon, doesn’t it? That’s the best way I can describe these two ladies. They are tough as nails on the outside through verbal expression, mannerisms, and weapon usage, but both are sensitive souls underneath.
In the show, Ellen instantly becomes a maternal figure for Dean and Sam, but shows she won’t take their crap. She wants to help them but kicks them out when they resist. She doesn’t want the same life for Jo as they have. In Good God, Ya’ll, she hugs Dean, then slaps him across the face for not calling to check in. Ellen cares for hunters, providing food, shelter, and much needed booze. She is every hunter’s mother.
Jo may punch you in the face, but you can see her vulnerability. In No Exit, Jo joins Dean and Sam on the hunt and is taken hostage. She’s terrified, but nothing will stop her from escaping and putting the spirit to rest. She even offers herself as bait, even though you see both her fear and insecurity. Jo seems fearless but learns quickly she needs Dean and Sam, and they need her.
The show’s producers don’t over testosterone these female characters or make them anti-men. Many producers create female characters on one end of the spectrum or the other, but Supernatural delivers both the independent and dependent spirit of the true modern-day woman. It’s not that women need men, or vise-versa, it’s that we all need each other.
If you haven’t seen the show or the older seasons recently, I recommend them – the older seasons rank among my favorite TV of all time. Happy hunting!
Revenant Publications 