Most of us have been there. You’re about to meet your significant other’s family for the first time – the parent(s), sibling(s), and maybe even their significant others. It can be pretty stressful because you want them to like you and feel like you fit in. After all, once you meet that special someone, you become part of their family.
What if you met the worst family ever? In 2011, a gem of a horror movie came out entitled You’re Next. The premise is pretty simple: An estranged family reunites to only serve as a hunt for three paid killers. I won’t go into the little twists and turns, but fair warning, this post contains spoilers!
I love this movie for two reasons: the family dynamics and the main character, Erin (Sharni Vinson), who reminds me of what Katniss Everdeen would act like at 28 years old in the same situation.
The movie’s trailer misleads the audience to think this is a home-invasion movie, and I once heard it was supposed to resemble The Strangers. Not even close. If you like traditional slasher movies, you’ll enjoy this gorefest. It’s not scary in the least. You’re Next is a slasher movie with multiple killers, one with good reason, and she’s creative.
Here’s the family breakdown:
2 parents + 3 sons + 1 daughter + 3 significant others
- Parents have a distant, practically loveless relationship.
- The siblings hate each other.
- The daughter is the princess, the sons are jealous of each other and tolerate her.
- Everyone argues about stupid stuff and judge one another, even though they all have problems and baggage.
- The siblings never say a single nice thing to one another.
- What’s better, this family is normal by today’s standards. They represent most families in present-day America (aka not perfect).
And I wanted them all to die. Aside from Erin, the entire cast deserved to die due to either stupidity or sheer a-holeness. They are horrible people in the ways they treat each other, especially the two brothers who plan the “let’s kill our parents and siblings to inherit all the money” idea.
Thankfully, Erin survives by taking the “bad guys” out. She’s smart and sweet, but doesn’t mess around. She takes control of the situation, and truly wants everyone to survive – until she finds out the truth. Then she doesn’t care; she only wants to survive, and she effs them up. She uses what’s available and gets out alive. She is the classic final girl.
Before attending a family reunion, here are the takeaways:
- Ask your significant other if they’ve been raised in a survival camp.
- Don’t invite them if a) they have and b) your family hates one another.
- If you hate your family that much, just stay away. It’s better for everyone.
- If you must gather, then don’t stay in a big house with lots of windows and doors. That’s what hotels are for!