Off the Charts: River Monsters

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“I love a fishing show.”

Words I never thought I’d say.  Or even consider.  Having grown up in the era of Bill Dance and Bass Masters and seeing balding men in fiber glass boats holding skinny fishing rods on calm lakes I can see why that would be…  But in 2009 Jeremy Wade changed the dynamic with the show River Monsters.

I first thought the show would be a Monster Quest-style hunt for cryptozoological creatures.  It still sounded intriguing, but a little kooky.  Then I thought it would be some kind of sensationalist program where they kill big fish and show them on camera.

I was pleasantly surprised that it was neither of those things.

The show is part detective show, part environmental show, part fishing show, part anthropological show, and part travel show.  It does all of those things better than almost any show I’ve seen.

Jeremy Wade is kind of the man.  It’s weird to say that about a fisherman given my TNT fishing show upbringing.  He’s a real outdoorsman (not the camo jacket, shaggy beard type).  Jeremy can live in the rainforest, with local tribes, or in 3rd world urban sprawl all the same.  He’s also a biologist, so instead of just fishing and looking at the big creature he understands its evolution, how it lives, and how it fits into the ecosystem.

He makes fishing a scientific extreme sport, both cerebral and physical.  He has strategies and it’s fascinating to hear how to go about catching different kinds of fish.  Where to set up a line (hearing him strategize about fishing in rapids, near the swirling slack, with an eddy nearby in case he falls in is pretty interesting.  The few times I’ve been fishing I randomly threw my bait in.  No wonder I’ve only ever caught one blue gill…); what kinds of hooks, baits, and lines to use; and most importantly his regard for the fish he’s catching.  He reveres them and doesn’t want them to come to harm.  He’d rather have them understood and respected the way he respects them.

He is as deferential to the people he meets on his journeys.  He wholeheartedly takes parts in the local customs, traditions, and superstitions.  He often says his logical side knows it should work…but the number of times he struggles with catching what he’s looking for, meets with the local shaman, then finds it are remarkable.

My favorite episode (except maybe the season finale of last season or the season premiere of the current season) is the pilot, before it was even called River Monsters, fishing for a monster fish in a fantastical river in India.  Seeing the creature he finally pulls from the river (and what he does to catch it) made for truly terrific television.

Jeremy Wade with the Goonch he caught on the River Monsters pilot.

Some of my favorite episodes are the ones you can’t find to buy unfortunately.  He produced a show prior to the River Monsters run that involved a trek into the South American jungle in search for an Arapaima.  We see the cameras rolling when his plane goes down in the jungle and…then see the journey continue after a day of recovery.  There is also a two-hour version of the pilot that is even better than the air version.

When the world lost Steve Irwin, an environmentalist of true enthusiasm, integrity, and charisma I wondered whether environmental entertainment would ever be the same.  Jeremy Wade is similar in many ways, his love for the environment, his desire to teach them to his viewers, and his utter stubborn dedication to accomplish his goals are all the same.  He does replace Irwin’s unbridled enthusiasm with a stoic intellectualism that is charismatic in its own way.

It’s one of the best shows on television.  If you haven’t seen it check it out.  It’s a rare gem on TV these days!

Check out the official website here.

Jeremy Wade’s official website.

Story of the Month Spring n’ Spiders

StoryoftheMonth

It’s spring!  In addition to warming weather, tempestuous storms, and the return of green to the world around us spring also means…bugs…

As a rule I have no distaste for insects, bugs, or mollusks that we share our world with, and this can be surprising as some of the encounters I’ve had would make you think otherwise!  As story of the month this month I’ll share one of my most memorable encounters with the various domestic invertebrates found in the southern United States:

Spring n’ Spiders

I inherited a garage room as a senior in high school after a brown recluse spider was found stuck to a glue trap and my mom refused to sleep there any longer.  As it was the biggest room in the house (with an outside door!) I didn’t hesitate to take it, but soon found the trapped spider had friends…hundreds of them…

Creepy Spider

At first seeing one of them would send me fleeing the room and sleeping on the couch in a different room.  After a while I got used to them.  Taking them out casually with a length of cedar pole or a riding crop (WHACK it’d cut them right in half…) I got from an art teacher.

One day, after finding a few of the glue traps I set so packed with the venomous little critters it had noticeable weight, I enlisted my friend Mike to come over, rip the room apart, open all the cupboards and closets, and bug bomb it into oblivion. So we did.  Took the place apart, including the couch, cushions, bed, closet, the whole place.

Lit the fuse (literally…we didn’t know we were supposed to turn off the gas…the water heater was in there and we could have truly declared inquisitorial exterminatus on that end of the house…) and left.  We came back after the allotted time and put everything back together.  We put a pizza in the oven and turned on Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom and flipped through a sword catalog for fun.

Sitting there, chilling, I looked down and saw one of the little bastards sitting right in the middle of my chest.  Normally pretty stoic I declared “Sunnuva bitch there’s one of em on me!” trampolined it off my shirt and into the floor, stomping it with my boot and grinding it across the carpet into shreds.  Mike joined the melee by taking both cans of wasp spray we had and spraying its dismembered body with them like a gunslinger.  We created possibly the deadest spider in the history of dead spiders…

Since then the brown recluse infestation has subsided.  It went from hundreds of them at all stages of maturity, creeping from closets, out from under furniture (and in one disturbing encounter dozens rappelling down webs from the ceiling) to…none…  At first I was mystified before I found a curio I bought had an infestation of its own…of cellar spiders.  These harmless little rascals spin irregular webs under furniture and in corners…the perfect places to ensnare brown recluses.  They did the job chemicals and smack ’em sticks couldn’t.  And I happily traded one infestation for another.

Despite these encounters I still have no arachnophobia (despite creepy spider dreams occasionally) and even released a captured brown recluse by a tree outside my previous place of employment (I figured what’s one more spineless, cantankerous, creeper around there…) and even had a “pet” spider outside my house for a while.  It goes to show nature might be creepy, and even dangerous, but it’s never to be hated or feared!

Enjoy the first few days of spring!  There are more such “nature” encounters coming soon!

See more stories in our Story of the Month section!

They Are The Men in Black

What do you to stop your 13-year-old from playing video games? Put in Men in Black.

The sci-fi comedy premiered in 1997, along with one of the greatest duos of our time. An unlikely pair to some became a crowd favorite, so much so that a third sequel was made some 16 years later.

The tag team:

J (Will Smith) and K (Tommy Lee Jones) make this movie. The know-it-all Smith and the seasoned Jones create an on-screen presence that’s hard to ignore. It’s one full of wit, sarcasm, and meanness, but of the best kind. Whether it’s the banter or the two men bullying Tony Shalhoub or a pug, they’re a perfect mix of rookie and veteran. The script and gestures are hysterical, and I just noticed Jay scratching his eyebrow with his middle finger for the first time this weekend. I always see something new.

Is there other life out there?

One of my favorite parts is the discovery phase. I love finding out there is a secret organization that manages the aliens on the planet. There aren’t a lot of aliens in this movie, but you know of bugs, the little worm guys in the break room, and the cute baby squid, to name a few. I remember seeing this movie as a kid and thinking, Wow… that would be a cool job. MIB made me question if we were alone in the universe.

Special effects don’t have to be over the top.

As we watched Friday, my son turned to me and asked, “Mom, how did they make that look so real?” The answer is a great movie crew and some CGI. The bad bug in this movie looks vicious, not cartoony. The spaceships don’t look fake or so unbelievable that you can tell a computer was used. The producers used real New York landmarks and celebrities, which adds something special. The effects aren’t so fast that you can’t keep up, and it’s a perfect mix of real and digital — certainly a lesson some directors should pay attention to now.

Take the time to rewatch.

I admit the sequels are not as good, as most sequels, but the series is super fun and entertaining. There are some light life lessons and touching moments, but overall Men in Black just takes you on an adventure without traveling too far from home.

Here are some of my favorite lines:

Beatrice: You here to make fun of me too?

Kay: No, ma’am. We at the FBI do not have a sense of humor we’re aware of. May we come in?

———–

Kay: All right… That’s confiscated. All of it. And I want you on the next transport off this rock or I’m gonna shoot you where it don’t grow back.

Jay: [shaken] Yeah and… and… and I’m gonna be back to talk about them Rolexes.

———–

Jay: [stepping on some cockroaches] Oh, I’m sorry. Was that your auntie? Then that must be your uncle over there!

———–

Jay: You know what they say. It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

Kay: Try it.

———–

Kay: I don’t suppose you know what kind of alien life form leaves a green spectral trail and craves sugar water, do you?

Jay: Uh, wait, that was on Final Jeopardy! last night. Damn, Alex said…

And don’t forget the song!

Off the Top of My Head #11: Roger Ebert

Off The Top of My Head

We at RevPub love movies.  We go to a lot of movies, buy a lot of movies, and watch a lot of movies on TV.  Our love of the media made us especially sad to hear of the death of singular film critic Roger Ebert.

Roger Ebert

As I said in my Dreamlike Gaming post, it takes more than negativity to review movies.  Roger Ebert loved movies.  He had an undeserved reputation of being a “film snob” (this was more true of his partner Gene Siskel who died in 1999) but I’ve found this not to be true.  He really loved movies and loved to watch them.  He simply expected a lot of them, and when they failed to deliver never hesitated to tell us.

While many of the movies you’d expect him to dislike he happily obliged and those art house movies you’d expect him to gush over he often did, he could also surprise you by giving you a review of a film you’d expect him to hate and finding he loved it with a classic “this is the reason we go to the movies.”  He could appreciate the deep themes of a terse drama as well as the big dumb fun of a well-made action film.

It is a pleasure to read his good reviews, whether you agree or disagree with him as he always give specific and valid reasons for his opinions.  More fun, however, are his extremely negative reviews.  When he hated (or hated, hated, hated) a movie; because he also had valid reasons for hating them and often had his sharpened pen ready to draw blood…

Roger Ebert showed us why film critics are a specific breed.  He noticed aspects of films for his reviews after only his screening views I don’t notice until after repeated viewings and could make judgments using his epically deep knowledge of film history.

I’m incapable of describing the prowess of a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist with the proper acumen so I’ll let the man speak for himself.  But the next time you go to a movie raise your 44oz soda, frozen coke, bucket of popcorn, or tray of nachos to the true loss of a real film institution.

Here’s to Roger Ebert.  We’ll miss you at the movies.

Roger Ebert’s Website

Some incredible negative reviews:

North

The Village

Deuce Bigalow European Gigalo

Transformers Revenge of the Fallen

Reviews of some of my favorite films:

Seven Samurai

Yojimbo

Shaun of the Dead

Negative review books:

I Hated, Hated, Hated This Movie

Your Movie Sucks

A Horrible Experience of Unbearable Length

Positive review books:

Roger Ebert’s Four Star Reviews

Roger Ebert’s Great Movies

Roger Ebert’s Great Movies II

Roger Ebert’s Great Movies III

A Collection of Ghost Stories

First, welcome to all the new followers! We appreciate the support, sharing, and comments, and look forward to reading your stuff, too!

Our Waverly Hills post has been very popular topic, so we’d like to share some previous stories with our new followers and anyone who missed them last year. Please note, these are true stories — read with caution … happy ghost hunting, everyone 🙂

Arnold the Poltergeist

Horror Movies and Real Life

Ghosts in Dreams

Computer Ghost

Grocery Store Haunt

Polar Bear

State Archives

Footsteps in the Hall

Dorm Ghost

And for those who like comics, please check out Lil’ Horsemen Issue 1

We hope you enjoy them, and feel free to share your ghostly links in the comments below!

That vs. Which: What to Do

GrammarTips

That and which – you see and use them all the time. My college grammar professor once explained that we naturally speak these words correctly, but when writing, they are misused. I think because we are raised to use them correctly we never stop to think about the rules. So, for those who need a refresher, here’s a quick guide on how and when to use that and which.

Common terms used in this post:

Clause: a sentence or a sentence-like section within a sentence

Essential clause: A clause that needs to be there in order for the sentence to make sense. Without the clause, the sentence’s meaning would be unclear. (It is essential to the sentence).

Nonessential clause: A clause that is not important to the meaning of the sentence. It is often additive. (It is nonessential to the sentence’s meaning).

Rule 1: Who refers to people. That and which refer to groups and things. For animals, this rule depends on the style guide you are using and varies. I prefer who for domesticated animals.

Examples:

Dr. Quain is the one who taught me these rules.

Dr. Quain belongs to the faculty that assisted me with graduation.

It was the cat who hurt his foot.

Rule 2: That introduces essential clauses. If you take everything after the word that/which out, and the sentence loses its meaning or doesn’t make sense, use that.

Examples:

I’m going to buy the car that has the best gas mileage.

He only watches shows that make him laugh.

Rule 3: Which introduces nonessential clauses (place comma before when using). It is also used if a selection or decision is implied (comma not needed).

Examples:

We watched him go down the hall alone, which darkened the further he went.

We won the game, which puts us in first place.

I don’t know which road to take.

Rule 4: If this, that, these, and those have introduced an essential clause, use which.

Examples:

These designs, which do not have approval, will be tough to apply.

That dog doesn’t know which bone to eat.

Sources:

The Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation, Grammar Girl, my brain

If you have any other tips, feel free to share them below!