Good Manners: Where Are They Now?

RavenRant

How many of you have been cut off while driving this week? What about had someone let a door close on you? Or received a response just as ‘yeah’ or been ignored completely?

If you answered yes to any of these, just know you are part of a large group of people who suffer from people with bad manners (I’m guessing 75 percent of the population). Normally, I would blame the holiday season because people behave at their worst this time of year, but the lack of good manners is just how society has evolved.

I wasn’t raised in a strict household and forced to say yes ma’am, no sir, etc. I remember my dad trying to instill this in me, but most times I refused because I didn’t respect him. As I grew up, I learned you should use these responses with elders, bosses, parents, and pretty much anyone – especially if you respect them. But most people don’t say please and thank you, so should we expect them to go a little further? Yes.

And here’s why: good manners are dying off. I remember saying yes ma’am to a manager several years ago, and she said, “Don’t call me ma’am, it makes me sound old.” Really? Having someone show respect makes people feel old? I never quite broke the habit, and still answer my desk phone yes ma’am or yes sir whenever possible. Of course, I didn’t want this woman – who was the same age as me – to feel old, but I would always show respect because I had no reason not to. People don’t do this anymore because they simply don’t care. ‘Yeah’ seems acceptable. People seem too busy to have good manners, and I have two words for that: bull stuffings.

What to Do

When I’m at work or a store and hold the door for someone, most times they look shocked. And I’m shocked at their response. I expect people to hold the door, and they should too. If you get to a door first and someone is right behind you, hold it. If someone is coming out and you are going in, open it. It’s probably the easiest thing to do in a day and can make someone smile or feel respected. And this doesn’t apply to just women. Men seem just as shocked and appreciated, and at the end of the day, we’re all the same. We’re just people.

Driving is probably the worst example of bad manners. The Nashville area is notorious for having bad drivers, and one reason is because people feel where they have to go is more important than everyone else. Tail-gating, honking, cut-offs, taking someone’s turn at a stop sign are things I experience every day. We all need to just take a deep breath and relax. Cutting someone off will save you a whopping three seconds and could cause a wreck, so it’s not worth it. And you may find someone who has good manners and will let you into traffic because they know what it feels like to wait. No matter how hard we try, we’re always going to have to wait.

Let’s not allow good manners to die. One person can make a huge difference, and maybe we can get back to a point where it’s not so rare. Good manners have been lost in older generations for so long, so if you’re younger than 50 and reading this, think about it. With a little change in our day-to-day, we can make the world a little easier to live in.

Table Top Home Brew

I’m actually working on a couple of posts that are taking a bit more oomph than expected so I thought I’d post something my friend Mike and I made a few months ago and we just last week starting up again.

With the growing popularity of Wil Wheaton’s TableTop and board gaming in general, a lot of YouTube Let’s Players are moving to the real world and out of the digital one.  There are a number of channels that play a variety of table top games on video and we, as avid fans and gamers ourselves, decided to start doing some of our own.

It’s VERY amateurish and has 0 production value (I used my Sony SLR which can only shoot 29:57 before it shuts off) and we had to set up a fixed position for the games we’ve played.  We had some good runs at this game of Castle Panic though and we hope to do some more with actual editing and shots.  Not to compete or become a “thing” just because we have a lot of “moments” in these games that are worht capturing, as many gamers do, and we feel it’s fun to share with the gamer community at large!

Beware there’s the language of a couple of people playing games…and not always so successfully in these vids!

 

Troop Beverly Hills: A Fabulous Flashback

Troop Beverly Hills

Photo by: drafthouse.com

Troop Beverly Hills is one of the most underrated girl power movies ever. The movie premiered in 1989, a year on the cusp of the ’90s before the Gulf War began when Hollywood was everything. It wasn’t just about the fabulous life of Beverly Hills residents, it’s a coming-of-age story about a group of girls, their troop leader, and the ultimate teen girl power movie predecessor to movies like Clueless and Mean Girls, both of which have similar themes.

I was 7 years old when this movie came out, and I have watched it dozens of times. As a little girl, it was one of my favorite movies because it gave me hope. I may not be rich or a wilderness girl, but I know – and did then – how to adapt and survive.

Reviewers and critics are often hard on this movie, but it’s worth a watch if you love three things: a good story, comedy, and a happy ending.

Here are my favorite things about Troop Beverly Hills:

Shelley Long – I’ve probably never seen another movie she’s been in, but I knew her from Cheers, so I recognized her at a young age. She’s over-the-top, super girly, and a little whiny. But she is a fantastic mother. As a mom, it’s hard not to respect a woman who never gives up and does everything she can to care for her daughter and troop. Long plays a loving and unconditionally accepting woman who goes above and beyond, no matter what obstacles she faces. She’s a great role model.

Unity – The movie brings together a diverse group of girls – both in the background and ethnicity – and shows how anything is possible when you work as a team. Sometimes we women struggle with female relationships because many times women are overly competitive, sneaky, and too cutthroat. Several “girl” movies deal with girl-on-girl crime, but Troop Beverly Hills shows that no matter what problems you have or how different you are, when woman (or people) come together, great things happen. It adds the team factor.

Relatability – Underlying themes include the struggles of divorce, neglectful parents, coming-of-age, money, power, politics, and fashion. It’s a great mother-daughter movie, although I bet there are some great dads out there who would enjoy it as well. When the movie came out, my parents were on the verge of divorce, so I related with Phyllis (Long) and her daughter Hannah (Jenny Lewis) the most. I could understand how the mom and child felt, and even today I bet there are thousands of kids who could do the same. It doesn’t matter how much money you have or what life you’ve lived, the theme of wanting a fulfilling life, sense of accomplishment, and love are something most of us always want.

Fun and Innocence – Sure there’s profanity, but it’s not overly done and used in the most passionate times. It’s a wholesome story that addresses serious issues in a fun, innovative way. Some of the fashion is ridiculous, the dialogue is smart, and there aren’t any shock scenes. I miss movies that work off the story instead of trying to amplify it for shock value. I miss movies with little if no CGI and good acting – movies that take a good story and characters and create a great movie. There are no overly dramatic scenes, and when there is drama, it is often followed with comedy to keep it lighthearted. We could all use a little more fun and innocence in our lives.

If you haven’t seen it or it’s been awhile, you should check it out. And feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below. We love to hear from you!